These Go To 11!

Ah, fresh off another Blunder loss, it's time to reflect on the wonderful number 11...

1. Spinal Tap's amps go to 11.
2. In Numerology, eleven is considered to be a Master Number.
3. Eleven is a Portland-based shoe brand, NOT named Nike.
4. Eleven possesses the qualities of intuition, patience, honesty, sensitivity, and spirituality, and is idealistic...all of the qaulities Clay Bennett does NOT possess.
5. Apollo 11 landed the first human on the moon. Since they were all humans, we know Clay Bennett was not among them.
6. United States Constitution has an 11th amendment: The Judicial power of the United States shall not be construed to extend to any suit in law or Equity, commenced or prosecuted against one of the United States by Citizens of another State, or by Citizens or Subjects of any Foreign State.
7. New York, home of the Jets, Giants, Mets, Yankees, Rangers, Islanders Knicks, and the Soup Nazi, was the 11th State to join the union.
8. Na or sodium, is the eleventh element. Sodium, aka salt, often results in high blood pressure, bad for humans, good for Clay.
9. Edgar Martinez, Mark Messier, Norm Van Brocklin, Phil Simms, Larry Fitzgerald all wore/wear number 11.
10. The Sonics won 11 in a row in 1996, until a 106 - 105 loss to San Antonio snapped that streak. The Zombie Sonics have never won more than two in a row.
11. Eleven Blunder losses this season, so far, after a 102 - 93 mauling by the Denver Nuggets on Monday.

Blunder: 12-11, 4th Place.
Next Loss: Tonight vs. Dallas.

More Corndogs! More Losses! More Blunder!

LeBron's 44 Sends Blunder to 10th Loss, Sees Empty Seats

LeBron's season-high 44 points led the Cavaliers embarrassment of Clay Bennett's Zombie Sonics on Sunday, 102-89. James added 7 boards and 5 assists in the rout.

Future ex Blunder Kevin Durant, one game closer to getting out of OKC, led the Blunder with 29 points in 42 minutes.

Thabo Sefalosha led the lowlights with zero points on a sizzling 0 for 4 shooting clinic in 28 minutes. Durant kicked in seven turnovers and Russell Westbrook enjoyed 4 personal fouls, 4 for 15 shooting, and 0 for 3 from three-point range.

Announced 'attendance' was 18,203. However, even James noticed empty seats. After a layup, James stopped to snag a french fry from the front row.

"There wasn't nobody sitting there," James said, "The french fries had their own seat."

Apparently potatoes are the new 'fan' in OKC. Very Interesting. Give Bennett credit; he has found a way to expand the Blunder fan base by reaching out to the coveted vegetable market.

According to a report in FORBES, several NBA teams have now moved under the $1 million in gate receipts per home game - with OKC leading the way down the drain. After only one season in OKC.

Has anyone else noticed most Blunder home games fall on Fri/Sat/Sun? Weird! Is there someone special this holiday season you'd want to annoy, isolate or enrage? Now's your chance! Treat 'em to the Blunder polo shirt, now on sale for only $64.99!


Blunder 12-10, 4th Place.
Next Loss: Monday at Denver.
Tornado watch: Looming.
Oklahoma 'celeb' sighting: Oklahoma women's basketball coach Sherri Coale sat courtside at the end of the scorer's table.

More Corndogs! More Losses! More Potatoes counted as fans!

Nine: The List!

1. One ass kicking by the Celtics, 105-87. Largest loss in the Bored Center this season.
2. Two points scored, combined, between Sefalosha, Collison and Livingston in 49 minutes.
3. Three rhymes with 'glee', as in a cultural television phenomenon, or that special feeling I get when Bennett suffers another loss.
4. Four Fouls on Durant, Green and Collison, to lead both teams.
5. Five Turnovers by Russell Westbrook, to lead both teams.
6. 'Six' rhymes with "pricks", like Clay Bennett, Howard Schultz, David Stern, Wally Walker, Dick Cheney and the one-eyed trouser monster - that's six pricks!
7. Seven Celtics scoring in double figures, led by Garnett's 23. The Blunder had two, led by future ex-blunder's Kevin Durant.
8. 'Eight' rhymes with 'great', which the Celtics are and the Blunder are NOT! Awwww!

And finally...

9. Nine Blunder losses! More Corndogs! More Losses! More Blunder!

Blunder: 10-9.
Next Loss: Monday vs. Golden State.
Tornado watch: Imminent.

Hilarious Joke of the Day

Too funny not to share, regardless of religious affiliation.

Four Catholic men and a Catholic woman were having coffee.
The first Catholic man tells his friends, "My son is a priest, when he walks into a room, everyone calls him 'Father'."

The second Catholic man chirps, "My son is a Bishop. When he walks into a room people call him 'Your Grace'."

The third Catholic gent says, "My son is a Cardinal. When he enters a room everyone says 'Your Eminence'."

The fourth Catholic man then says, "My son is the Pope. When he walks into a room people call him 'Your Holiness'."

Since the lone Catholic woman was sipping her coffee in silence, the four men give her a subtle, "Well....?"

She proudly replies, "I have a daughter, slim, tall, 38D breast, 24" stomach and 34" hips. When she walks into a room, people say, "Oh My God."

Blunder Losses Mount, Drop Eighth Game

The Blunder continue to pad the loss column as they fell to the short-handed Rockets on Sunday, 100-91. Houston used the adversity of Etan Thomas eye gouging of Luis Scola's to fuel the comeback that put the Blunder in their place - the loss column. After Etan "Bill Romanowki" Thomas's eye-gouge/assault, which knocked Scola out of the game, Aaron Brooks and Chris Landry rallied the Rockets with 21 points a piece to lead Houston, despite having Yao Ming, Tracy McGrady and now Luis Scola out.

Future ex-Blunder Kevin Durant led OKC, as always, with 25 points on 10 for 19 shooting in 45 minutes, while hauling in nine boards. Jeff Green, 0 for 5 from three-point land, and Serge Ibaka led the Blunder with 4 fouls apiece. Kevin Durant had six turnovers, and Toshe Sefaloshi went 2 for 7 from the field and 0 for 3 from three-point range to finish with six points in 38 minutes to lead the low lights.

The Blunder committed 20 turnovers and were a sizzling 1 for 15 from 3-point range.
The Rockets used a 29-14 advantage on the boards, sans Ming, to rally back from a 54-45 halftime deficit.

And speaking of deficits, there was a noticable fan deficit at the Furd Center. The game was announced as another non-sell out. Damn shame that is. Probably time to rebuild the arena (at taxpayer/suckers expense, undoubtedly).


Blunder: 9-8
Next Loss: Wednesday vs. Philadelphia
Tornado watch: Hazerdous Weather Watch in effect

More Corndogs! More Losses! More Blunder!

Holmgren Returning to Seattle?

From what I am hearing, it's happening. Rumors are running wild Mike Holmgren is about to be reunited with the Seattle Seahawks. Holmgren, who guided Green Bay to the Super Bowl and Seattle to it's only Super Bowl, has been itching to get back into the game and will reportedly return to lead Seattle as its GM.

So, where does that leave Tom Ruskell? Out. Waaaaay out.

The much maligned GM has come under heavy fire recently as the Seahawks, a disappointing 3-7 this season, have spiraled downward under his watch. He's been blamed for the Steve Hutchinson debacle and his failure to address the huge void it left on the offensive line. That botched deal, where he refused to sign Hutch early in the season and instead 'transition' tagged him (the difference being Seattle would've received two first-round picks as compensation) may be his lasting legacy. Many bitter fans believe that line got the team to the Super Bowl and it's subsequent disintegration has doomed the team. Truth be told, it wasn't entirely up to him, but he'll always own the legacy of the poison pill debacle.

Ruskell's drafting legacy is a mixed bag. While this season he scored high on most boards, his previous drafts have produced only a minimum of impact players, most notable were several busts in the secondary. The linbacking core has been a strength but get's little help up front or behind it. The hiring of Mora while Holmgren was said to be an effort to 'ease the transition' but it was widely reported the team was split in it's allegiances between Mora and Holmgren supperters during the tumultous final year of Holmgren coaching.

Not all the problems are Ruskell's fault. The team has endured staggering injuries the past two seasons and quarterback Matt Hasselbeck has gone into decline.

All signs point to Holmgren returning to Seattle and reuniting with Paul Allen. He has had his year off to re-energize and now can tackle the GM job he had to give up while coaching. He'd likely be highly motivated to prove his superior skills over the much-maligned Ruskell's, whom he feuded with over personnel decisions.

Will Jim Zorn be the next Seahawk to return to Seattle is he is fired in DC as is widely expected? Zorn made a name for himself as Seahawk's quarterbacks coach and was whisked away to be the Redskins head coach, a position clearly above him at the time. But that was Snyder's error. The lessons Zorn's learned, at Snyder's expense, could be used back in Seattle. Especially as this franchise rebuilds its offensive line and finds a new quarterback.

What happends with Mora? I imagine he gets another year or so before any decisions would be made. You don't want a revolving door head coaching situation. While his first season is a disaster, I am not sure you pull the trigger yet. Although with well-respected Holmgren as GM, it makes you wonder who he could lure to Seattle should Mora be canned.

Presto! Blunder Bumble to Magical Loss!

Former Supersonic Rashard Lewis had 17 points, 10 rebounds and nine assists in three quarters to lead the short-handed Magic over the Blunder in Orlando on Tuesday, 108-94. The Magic led by as many as 30 points before Magic starters went to the bench early, allowing the Blunder to make it appear respectable.

Future ex-Blunder Kevin Durant was held to 12 points, far below his 32.8 average. He also contributed to the lowlights with a game high 4 turnovers! Tosha Sefalosha poured in 2 points on a scorching 1-4 shooting clinic in 25 minutes of 'playing' time. That's two points more than I scored. The Blunder also managed to give up 40 points in the paint. Solid!

Cy Young Award winner Zach Greinke of the Royals was in the audience. Greinke is from Apopka, a suburb of Orlando. Like the rest of America, Greinke was not wearing any Blunder merchandise.

No Tornado Warnings were issued in OKC, nor were there any ZombieSonics sell out warnings issued. In fact, no sellouts this season. I thought OKC 'supported the team'? I suppose a couple more arena rebuilds and an upgraded corndog stand, at OKC taxpayer expense of course, and I'm sure they'll come runnin' to the games! They may have to walk though, because according to Forbes, Oklahoma has the second highest obesity rate in the US.

More Corndogs (literally!) More Losses! More Blunder!

Blunder: 6-6
Next Loss:
Season Outlook: Dry and Dusty. 90% chance of failure.